Grateful Thoughts on Motherhood

by Molly Kennedy

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I’ve never had anything I cared about more passionately, wanted to be good at more desperately, felt less competent to handle, and was more eager to sacrifice my life for.

I love this quotation about motherhood.

On Pre-Motherhood:  Reflecting back to when it was just me and Kurt and our dream to be parents.  My introduction to motherhood was not what I had expected it to be. Our first few years of marriage were a whirlwind of four pregnancies, one preemie, two miscarriages, and two c-sections, one of which was an emergency.

After we had Grace, I had two miscarriages. I was getting closer to 40, and I was just done. The pain of miscarrying--not just physically but emotionally--ripped apart my soul. I couldn’t do it again. Grace was just going to have to be an only child. But then...one day, I was praying, and I heard God. Not an audible voice. But a press upon my spirit. God said, Get up and throw away your birth control. Without even a thought or an argument or a question, I did as He asked--probably the quickest response of obedience I’ve ever had. Two weeks later, I was pregnant, and I braced myself for another miscarriage. I was expecting it. I was honestly expecting it until the day I delivered our second girl, Aimee.

On Motherhood: I knew I would love my kids.  I have been blown away by the intensity of it, even after all these years--the love, the protectiveness--how my heart can shatter into a million fragments if one of them is hurting or how it can leap for joy to watch them delight in each other.  I tell my husband all the time I don’t want them to get any older, that THIS is my favorite age, and then they get older, and I have a new favorite age.

I loved them when they were littles, I loved them when they were mediums, and I am crazy about them now that they are teenagers.

Today: Heading into Thanksgiving week, I am thankful for so many things. But in thinking about my girls, I am thankful...

  • That they still want to cuddle with me and hold my hand in public

  • That they look better in my long boots than I do

  • That they have embraced God’s gifts of music and learning and humor--things that have brought so much joy to my life

  • That even when things are tense around the house, they still want to hang out here

  • That they want to have friends over and they are amazing hostesses who plan fun activities--Christmas parties and story writing parties and game parties on a Sunday afternoon

  • That they love their daddy

  • That they serve in the kids’ ministry at church and are highly sought after babysitters

  • That they make handmade birthday presents for their friends; usually baked goods

  • That they are unique people with strong opinions (some that are very different than mine)

  • That they love Jesus

James 1:17a says, “Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights.”

I love every piece of this verse. My girls are good and perfect gifts. Lights given to me and to Kurt from the Father of heavenly lights.

Between now and Christmas, I pray that you would have moments to revel in the wonder and glory and light of your kids. In fact, I would encourage you to take time this week to list what you love about each and every one of your kids and express your gratitude that you get to be their mama. And happy Thanksgiving.